Terrible tunnel videos/music seem to be a theme this season (for an example, see our previous post regarding Michigan's Ed Hardy Theme of the Year). Just when we thought things couldn't get worse, Texas Tech brings us this little gem:
We are not from Texas, but having visited there this summer, we understand things are a bit different in that part of the country. That being said, there are so many awesomely bad things that lead to this epic fail, we don't know where to begin.
For starters, how many crazy, non-sensical cliches can one include in a 1:41 monologue:
- "...it's all hat and no cattle..." at :21 second mark (we don't understand what that means... could someone from Texas explain?)
- "...here at the Jones, it's bushwacking time..." at :42 second mark (does that mean we all have to go to work?)
- The statement about barbed wire in a tree on someones facemask at :45 second mark (we're pretty sure that this is either prohibited equipment or a personal foul)
- "Welcome to Raiderland..." at 1:21 mark (this seems like an advertisement for a theme park; then again, we guess that's how opposing offenses feel when they take the field against TT's defense)
And then there's the inadvertent, homoerotic scene at the 1:14 mark where the player strokes what can only be described as the world's largest gun (did Andy Dick come up with this video?).
We always knew that Tubbs loved some media glitz and flare, but we never dreamed we'd see him dressed up as cross between Colonel Sanders and Cowboy Gil.
We always knew that Tubbs loved some media glitz and flare, but we never dreamed we'd see him dressed up as cross between Colonel Sanders and Cowboy Gil.
(We always hated the Colonel, with his wee, beady eyes and that smug look on his face...)
(Wow, we should have used this as a doppelganger for Tubbs)
It's clear to us that the Coen brothers were not available to take the lead on writing/directing this montage for the Red Raiders. Rumor has it, however, that Tubb's former arch-nemesis, Jimmy Rane, wrote, directed (and tried to star in) the video.
(Did Tubb's draw inspiration from Rane's Yella Fella ads?)
When asked to comment on the video, former coach Mike Leach had this reaction:
Coach Leach then commented that if he were able to re-make the video, it would look something like this:
The Tide and Tiger - A blog covering the best and worst of Auburn and Alabama football and other sports.
+1 for answering "How can Anyone Hate "The Colonel"? "He puts a spice in his chicken that makes you crave it fortnightly, Smartarse...!"
ReplyDeleteHuh, huh. He said, "bushwacking time." Then he said, "Let us show you how to take down a longhorn." Uh, huh, huh.
ReplyDeleteYeah, he said "bushwacking."
ReplyDeletelmao. I love this.
ReplyDeleteYou wouldn't understand "bushwhacking" unless you're from Texas. Just like we wouldn't go to Alabama and understand why you say War Eagle, but you're really a tiger. OR maybe you can tell me why Alabama is the Crimson Tide because in Texas that’s an algae that kills our fish in the gulf not a herd of elephants. But you know...to each their own.
Red raider for life GUNS UP!